The Recipe Of You

The Ingredients That Make You... You.

• A bit of shyness
• A pinch of anger
• A bunch of charm
• A bowlful of love and laughter
• A spoonful of perseverance
• A cupful of strength

If I were to create a recipe of who I am, I think this would be me.

Have you ever thought about who you are? Let’s do an exercise.

Step 1: List Everything You Hate About Yourself

Don’t worry about how it sounds, just list it out:

• I’m lazy.
• I get distracted.
• I doubt myself.
• I criticize myself all the time.
• I think I’m ordinary.
• I have a terrible voice.
• I’m rude.
• I’m condescending.

These are all the things you think you hate about yourself, right?

Now, imagine the stories you’ve attached to these emotions. Remember them. Connect everything you’ve ever done — every experience, every reaction — to these stories and emotions. All of this forms the web of your negative self-beliefs. These are the beliefs you’ve grown up with, absorbed, and accepted as truth.

Step 2: Write the Opposite Beliefs

Now, look at each of these beliefs and write the opposite of them. Yes, the opposite. Because these are just beliefs, and beliefs can be rewritten.

• I am active.
• I am focused.
• I love myself.
• I am perfect the way I am.
• I am extraordinary.
• I am honest.
• I am straightforward.

Now read them again slowly. These are all you. This is the real you — the secret recipe that makes you who you are.

We tell ourselves stories and make them so real in our minds that we forget they aren’t true. We get so comfortable being ordinary that the very thought of being different feels uncomfortable, scary, even hard to accept. That’s why they say growth is always uncomfortable. And so is breaking a habit. Because both are meant to stretch you. And yes, sometimes, it hurts.

Each time you catch yourself repeating the old story of who you’ve always been, pause and tell yourself the new story. Repeat it until you begin to accept it. The first time you do, you might still feel afraid. That’s okay. But imagine the person you could be — the extraordinary version of you that’s been living inside the small box of being “ordinary,” comfortable in that old habit.

Stop Looking Outside, Look Within

Let me share another secret: You are special — only to you. Yet we keep looking outward for proof. We seek validation from the world to remind us of our worth. We choose partners who mirror our beauty back to us. We look to our parents, hoping their love will help us see what’s special within. We look at the entire world to tell us how great we are but we rarely look at ourselves. We’ve simply never been taught to have a relationship with the “me” inside. It’s easier to take for granted what you cannot see.

So we keep searching for the perfect person to see us so that we can live through their version of who we are. But the most special person has always been you.

If you can learn to accept who you are, to see the special within you, imagine how extraordinary you could become. So stop looking outside. Look at the me with all your wonderful ingredients that make the recipe of you... you.

Love,
Shwetambari